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Author Topic: What I Found  (Read 2114 times)
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Jesus Christ Almighty
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« on: January 14, 2008, 12:59:57 AM »

I wander in hope of finding the one true figure in my mind,
Transformed into reality, and wandered from my imagination into the world

Seeking that object finds my mind into landscapes I once left
Promising me that I would not venture there again
Finding that which I once loved
Finds me again

I wander in the field
For days it seems
Until I find it

I promised for reasons,
Reasons which I have long forgot

Left alone to bide its time
Separated from myself
Torn out by me
For some purpose,
But I am lost to find it
Instead it finds me
Connects as if it never left

As I walk away from the field
I feel whole once again
And I see reflected behind me
Those fallen who remained in my way
Bloody bodies and singed hearts left everywhere

As I walk away from the field
Where I made my choice
Where I found what was missing
Where I failed my promise

As I walk away from the field,
Where I buried my Hate.


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If I close my mind in fear, please pry it open.

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« Reply #1 on: January 14, 2008, 12:08:45 PM »

I can relate to this one personally more than the others that I have seen from you so far.  Me likey.  I think it would be better without the fallen bodies imagery and should instead see more exploration into the idea of something that was sworn against but comes back because you can't remember why you swore against it.  That hits home for me, haha.  Yeah... dead on. 
« Last Edit: January 14, 2008, 12:27:31 PM by MetalMusicMan » Logged
Jesus Christ Almighty
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« Reply #2 on: January 14, 2008, 12:21:31 PM »

Daaaaamn!

This is my favorite of yours as it deals with introspection and not projection. I very much like the "Zen and the art of motorcycle maintenance" transformation throughout the poem. I personally like the imagery of bodies and the atonement suggested.
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« Reply #3 on: January 14, 2008, 02:25:27 PM »

I think this is the best thing you've posted thus far, and most definetly the most thought provoking
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« Reply #4 on: January 14, 2008, 07:08:46 PM »

I think this is the best thing you've posted thus far, and most definetly the most thought provoking

Aye!
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