I was at work yesterday and one of my co-workers was messing around on her laptop when she randomly exclaimed, "Crotchduster is the shit!" Of course, such a statement obviously begs the question, "What the hell is a Crotchduster?" Apparently, Crotchduster is the most retardedly pointless and amazing creation since... well, ever. It's the most retardedly pointless thing ever created, and it's amazing.
What we have here is a group of rather strange individuals who have seen it fit to take every musical genre imaginable and stuff them all into one amazingly stupid album, an album that goes by the name of "Big Fat Piece of Shit". Yes, that's the album name. The songs usually start off with extremely ghetto fabulous rap beats, then suddenly explode into black cult death metal of sorts, transitioning to industrial, to ballad, to punk, to meatloaf-esque love songs, and back to ghetto rap again as the whole cycle starts over. The whole project seems to be a simultaneous celebration and parody of every musical genre in the world, generally focusing on how easy it is to make "hit" songs in every form of music. Crotchduster does this by using retarded-assed lyrics overlayed on radio-friendly music from each of the primary music genres.
I am simply amazed at this: it's so retarded, it's beautiful.
Listen to the single, "Mammal Sauce", off of Crotchduster's album "Big Fat Piece of Shit" and be afraid, be very afraid.Be sure to wait for the genre changes, they will hit you when you least expect it. Oh, and incase you're curious, here are the lyrics to the song:
LISTEN UP MOTHERFUCKER
I GOT SOMETHING I NEED TO SAY
IF YOU DONT USE MAMMAL SAUCE
YOU MIGHT AS WELL BE GAY
I FEEL IT RUNNING THROUGH MY BRAIN
I FEEL IT RUNNING THROUGH MY EYES
YOU HEAR THE NAME THATS CALLING YOU
IT MAKES YOU HYPNOTIZED
WILLIAMS
SLIPTOFLAPPY RAPPY
AND A CARPAL TUNNEL PUDDING FLANKER
NABBLE AND A STAMPY AND A
PIGEON SMELLING GENERATOR
SEE A CHITLIN WAFER AND A
CHOCOLATE BUTTERED HORSES ASS
FRABBLE OBBLE ABBLE AND A
STUPID MONKEY CHICKEN GAS
CHINESE DIARRHEA PRISON CARPET
CHUNKY HARPLEGIG
NOPALIASEAH PERFORATED
PURPLE PARKLE PIG
MY MAMMAL SAUCE IS THE BEST MAMMAL SAUCE
SPREAD MAMMAL SAUCE ON MY WANG
WE MAKE MAMMAL SAUCE IN BILL WILLIAMS LOFT
AND WE EAT A BUCKET OF TANGGod damn, I'm so confused. Oh, and one of the band members is a Dog. As in, a dog. Actually a dog. He's the drummer. Yeah.
